So that another could hold our hand

"God gave us five fingers -
and left a gap in between each finger..."
so another could put his fingers there -
and hold us entwined closely to his heart...

Those were the comforting words i read -
and i do feel that it's absolutely true...
for God gave us fingers to pick up things -
and hold on to them, poke them or hook them...

But the most comforting use of our little fingers
is to speak the language of love:
we could give our pets a loving stroke -
or run our fingers lovingly through his hair...

One little finger on the lips could put an end to a dispute -
a thumbs up shows all's well, another little finger could brush away a tear...
but the most comforting feeling is to have someone hold our hand -
when we are sick, or in trouble, or alone in the dark...
when the whole world is on the other side, sniggering -
and we are left standing alone against the fury of the storm...

It is then that one yearns to feel the warmth and comfort -
of another five strong fingers intertwined around ours...

A mother's love knows no boundaries

The love of a mother for her child -
knows no boundaries...
for it can scale the highest mountain -
and scour the deepest seas...

A mother would not forget her duty -
to love, provide for, and protect her child...
for there is this unbreakable bond -
that binds her child forever to her...

So, come rain or shine,
mum's always there...
to share in all your joy -
and shoo away all your troubles...

I've not forgotten my roots

No, i've never forgotten my roots -
my ancestors, my family, my relatives, my friends...
i may have chosen the road less trodden in life -
but i've always kept my roots and my loved ones in view...
i've gone through the process of growing up with my fears -
but growing older has made me see a little farther...
try a little harder and made me grow out of those fears
that had plagued me all my life: the fear of failure...

Now there is no turning back the clock -
no second thoughts, no retracing my own footsteps...
for there are things in life that one can change -
and other things in ones life that cannot be changed...
there are things that are beautiful and innocent in ones past -
that can never be retrieved, once the innocence is gone with the past...
and now that i've come to the last quarter of my life -
in what seems like the blink of an eye 58 years have gone by:

There is nothing in the past that i should regret not doing -
and a lot more for the future that i need to do before i call it a day...

Just show a little kindness

When someone is down and out -
don't leave him in the dumps...
what he really needs is -
just some caring and sharing...
When someone is feeling sick at heart -
don't ever tell him to just forget...
for if he can so easily forget,
he wouldn't have been sick in the heart...
When someone is feeling sad and blue -
just show him a little kindness...
for that may well be just what he needs -
to get himself out of the blues...
Just show a little kindness -
it's the least thing you could do...
just by showing a little kindness -
and you would have gone a long, long way with him...

Taking a break

Remember to always take a break:
when the going's tough -
just take a break,
when things get tougher -
all the more reason to take a break;
and when things are going just great -
still, take a break:
one's a booster; the other's a 'retainer' -
one's to jack you up, sky high;
the other's to hold your floating feet, firmly to the ground!

So, i'll always find time to just take a break -
so that yesterday's sorrow will never be sadder,
today's chores will even seem lighter,
and tomorrow's hopes will glow much brighter...

I am what I am

I love my life -
'coz you are in it...
i love the simple things in life -
'coz you showed me how...
i love the beauty in nature -
'coz you taught me how...
and i love to drive around the countryside -
coz you love it too...

I've always strived to be what i want to be -
fighting against the odds...
i've always wanted to uphold the truth -
no matter what the cost...
i've always been all all alone -
for trying to not trade in my principles,
for something inferior, something less...
not wanting to throw in the towel -
and give up what i believe is true and right...

Now i believe what i do is just and right -
'coz you believe in me and trust what i'm doing...
now i know i can be what i am - and need not conform -
'coz you've always loved me for what i am, not what i should be...

A friend who's selfless, steadfast and fair

I've got a great friend who is Heaven-sent:
selfless, steadfast and very, very fair - that's him,
friendly, caring, and generous to no end - that's also him,
determined, courageous and full of energy - that's definitely him!
... so God sent me this friend - to help me find my way in life -
God sent me this friend - that i may find:
happiness in my heart, peace in my soul...;
God gave me this pillar of strength:
that i may learn to be brave -
and, like him, have the heart of a lion...
in everything that i do - big or small -
my pillar of strength, should things go wrong...

"My love will get you home"

You are like a weary traveller -
you've traversed the thick jungle alone...
both far and wide, high and low -
and conquered the valleys and the hills...
But now you are weary -
and your tired bones need to rest...
so i'll lay your feathered mat, and air your quilt -
that you may lie down to rest your tired back a wee bit...
And i'll seat myself by your side -
and tell you the tales you so love to hear...
and i'll sooth your brows and cool your forehead -
and watch over you as you sleep...

If i could sing to the world

Many a time have i wanted to sing to the world -
songs of praises, that would be heard far and wide...
Many a time have i tried to sing to the world -
songs of happy memories, that would be a joy to remember...
For the joy in my heart comes from the joy of living -
and the joy of living comes from the joy of giving...
and that joy of giving, selflessly, i'd learnt from you -
who always gives, so effortlessly, of your self, your time, your love...
i have learned from you: to be generous and caring -
not only to loved ones but also needy strangers...
i have learned: to be generous and sincere -
in giving praises to others, where they are due...
i have learned: to always place others' welfare before mine -
just as you have so naturally done, every day of your life...
i have learned all these and many, many more -
and have become a better person since knowing you...
so let me sing the song in my heart -
the song that says it all: that i am what i am because of you...

Today i feel so, so sad

Today is a day when i feel so, so sad -
i just wish i could cry my heart out...
today when i should be happy,i just cried -
in the midst of such beauty,
on such a lovely day -
something inside me just died...
for it seems like everyone has a word that hurts -
and all had chosen today to heap them all on me...
and it really hurts, deep, deep down -
so something inside me just died...
and all the beauty on such a lovely day -
becomes a smudge and a smear...
and whatever that's beautiful and joyful -
just vapourised before my teary eyes...

A Day to Remember

You have given me a day to remember –
For the rest of my life,
You have done what others have not –
In making me feel so well-loved, so special, so good
That I feel my heart swell with a love so intense -
That I have to keep the tears from falling down…

For you have done what no one has ever done –
Nor ever could have done, to make me feel good,
You have done countless thoughtful little things –
That no one could have even thought of doing, for me…
You have shown me how selfless one can be –
To be able to put all others’ welfare before one's own…

I know that you really love me, really, truly so –
For your actions tell me so, and your words assure me so…
I know now that you are steadfast and true –
And that no one can be more gallant than you, it’s true…
I know that I’m the luckiest girl alive - for being the one you love –
And I hope that it will always stay that way – I really, truly hope so…

Life as i see it

When i was young, inexperienced and lacking confidence -
a child's life seemed to be such a great problem to solve,
then as i grew up, awkward and shy and self-conscious -
a teenager's life seemed to be worse: more problems still...!
as i grew into my twenties, life seemed to be full of adventure -
new things to learn, new skills to acquire, a brand new career, marriage...
one would think that things would tone down and stabilise in the 30s and 40s -
but no, life is still full of new things, filled with all kinds of changes...
from KBSM to ETeMS, from a junior teacher to a senior one... a panel head -
from a course participant to facilitator... from being a back-bencher to the speaker...
even in ones 50s, life is not a bed of roses but a battlefield of greater challenges -
a test of ones confidence and capability: to handle things with logic and reasoning,
not just emotions and feelings... to express ones opinion and face objections objectively -
to stand firmly against the whole wide world, and defend ones beliefs to the very end...

"I Don't Know But I Believe"

There are things that are meant to be -
and things that aren't supposed to happen...
but whatever it is i believe that it will be -
if it needs to be - for God will make it so, i'm sure...
i don't know how i know but i do know -
that some things are meant to be...

So i'll just go on hoping and believing -
that one day all will be well...
and i'll go on changing the things that i can -
and accept the things that i can't change...
for better or for worse -
i don't know but i believe God will make it so...

And i believe, for better or for worse -
in my own heart, if not my better judgement...

Life at 58

I've always had this fear -
of growing old and wrinkled and ugly...
i've always feared the misery and sickness and immobility
that comes with old age and growing old...
in fact the fear was so great -
that at the age of 10 i'd already wished i would be dead at 45
so i would not be old and ugly and sickly and a burden to others...

But now that i've past that 'ideal' age of 45 -
every year is an extra special bonus from God...
that i would use carefully and gratefully and thankfully -
in His service: to help touch the lives of all who come me by...
every year would be a great year for friends to later remember me by -
and a year to recollect and reminise and recall when i'm really, truly old...

So, i'll go on touching lives and bringing joy to all who come by -
and thank God for giving the 10-year-old a second chance at growing old...

"I never really had a dream come true"

"I never had a dream come true -
till the day that you found me..."
then everything seems to happen all at once -
and i seem to be walking on Cloud 9 every day...

Though i know not how long this happy feeling will last -
i will still go on hoping that it will stay forever so...
though i know not how the world will take to this -
my new outlook on love and life, society and norms...
i will not give up trying to hold on -
to that most wonderful dream...

So, forgive me if i am wrong -
but i've made my choice,
and my decision to go on -
with that new outlook on love and life...

Loving You

Yes, i love all of you -
and loving you
is the best thing
i can do...

For it is love -
that spurs me on
and nothing but love -
that lifts me over all the hurdles...

When i'm down -
and giving up seems so easy
it is love for you -
that helps me to strive on...

When days are cloudy -
love makes the sun shine through...
and if it rains or storms -
love will keep me safe to carry on...

So i've lived on the loving look -
on all your happy, smiling faces...
i've relied on your loving support -
to get me through each difficult day...

And it is always love, nothing but love -
for 'love conquers all' is true for me, and all...

"Everything that I do"

I've done many things in my life -
and lately, I've strived to do much, much more...
i've tried to stretch every minute of every day -
that i may have yet a minute more than before...
for i feel time is running out on me -
as this last lap is coming to a final end...

So, everything that i do, every day of my life -
i do them for you...
everything that i plan, and carry out, every day -
i do them just for you...
that i may leave this, my last effort -
to do everything i can, just for you...

And on the day when i say my goodbyes -
i'll have no regrets:
that i've not done my best -
that i've not given my all...
for i have tried giving my best -
and i've tried giving all that i possibly can...


Coz everything that i do -
i do them just for you...

Life is not only "a bed of roses..."

Finally it dawned on me -
that the facts of life cannot be denied:
for life can never be only a bed of roses -
without the thorns;
or a herd of huge beefy bisons -
without their horns...

So is it, and so be it, with my life -
since that is the fact of life:
i've got my share of happiness, my joyful moments -
but i've got to walk down the thorny paths, as well...
i've got my fair share of pain and suffering -
as well as the joy of loving and giving - living...

I've always been thankful for my good fortune -
and taken mishaps and misfortune in my stride, too...
i've always accepted what Destiny has in store for me -
with the great hope that i won't just be picking rose petals...
scattered by the wind and trampled underfoot in the gloom -
that one day all the promising rose buds would be in full bloom...

And i'll sit and wait patiently -
for this rosy dream to come true...

Writing from my heart

I love to write - from my heart -
and that's what i always do...
i love to tell whatever's old and new -
straight from my heart - just like i often do...

So let me know if it hurts to know -
what's buried in my heart, old or new...
let me know if you wish to hear not -
what has always been there - buried in my heart...

And i feel i must pour out my heart -
to someone who would listen, once in a while...
and i feel that i should let you know -
what you should rightly know: the truth...

So i'll just go on pouring out my heart -
and hope that one day you'll understand:
that the truth cannot be concealed for it's there -
a secret that won't stay buried in my heart forever...

Just say that you'll understand -
that what has to be, has to be...
coz it's Destiny's game -
coz it's written in the stars...

And i hope love will always be there -
to see us through that last lap of our life...

"I cried a tear or two"

There were times when i cried a tear, or two -
and it was just for you... that little tear or two...
there were times when i had them all flowing swiftly -
and they were all tears for you, too...

For it pains me to remember your smile -
without wanting to cry a little tear for you...
it hurts me to know you aren't yourself lately -
though i know why, and that's the reason i cry, for you...

And when i hear our favourite song on the radio -
i'll be thinking of you, singing those sad, sad lines alone...
for though you smiled and said you'll manage without me -
i know... the smile says it all: you won't, and you can't...

And i know, for every tear that i shed, you suffer more -
for you love me deeply, i know... and i can feel it - i know...

"All kinds of everything"

When i hear a sad song over the radio -
or catch a whisper among the leaves in the wind...
when i hear laughter under the trees,in the park -
or the sound of a morning storm brewing in the dark...
and fierce winds churning up a distant cloud of dust -
or when clear blue skies turn murky with threatening clouds...
i'll remember you... driving around the countryside alone -
and wonder if you are thinking of blue skies, and happy times...?

When i see rose petals, fading in the shade -
or a lonely-looking bird searching for its lost mate...
when i see forlorn faces wandering in the park -
or a single pair of footprints tracing another in the sand...
i'll be asking,"Where is your mate...?" -
"Is she no longer near...? Is that why you are sad?"

And when i hear the wolf howl in the moonlit night -
i'll be wondering if such a tortured cry speaks of missing its mate...?

"All kinds of everything"

I saw lovely roses all along the way -
they remind me of you and your roses, so lovely...
i saw lovers in the park, in lobbies and walkways -
they remind me of you and your love, too...

I look up at deeper blue skies, with no clouds -
it reminds me of white clouds sailing in clear blue skies...
i see maple trees and coniferous forests flashing by -
they remind me of our chengal and meranti in equitorial jungles...

I look at people with happy smiling faces all around me -
they remind me of my own friends - are they smiling, too...?
i take a deep breath of the crisp morning air -
isn't this what i do back home in Malaysia, too...?

As i walk down stairways and plod down corridors -
i'll be thinking: isn't this what i do back home, too...?
i take a sip of my morning black coffee without sugar -
and was straining my ears to hear the familiar: kopi-O kosong...

"All kinds of everything - reminds me of you":
your wonderful ways, your familiar looks, your smiling faces...
and i can't say i don't miss you, my homeland -
coz i really, truly, do miss you a great, great, deal...

When on holiday,

Oh, yes, i'm on a holiday -
far, far away from my homeland...
and if you ask me what i do best -
the answer is missing loved ones back home!

I miss my little girl back home -
she used to tag along on all our holidays...
i miss friends that i have to leave behind -
going about their daily chores, i suppose...?

I miss little favourite places i used to go -
the beaches and the lakes, the hills and the falls...
for they play in my mind's eye, right before me -
clearly, poignantly, lovingly nostalgic in every way...

And i do miss my homeland, Malaysia -
and all the people i know, back in Malaysia...
for even when on holiday, so far, far away -
"all kinds of everything, reminds me of you..."

Love is finding happiness in sharing

Loving someone makes me feel so happy -
i'ld love all of you to feel it, too...
it is the joy that comes from knowing
that another shares the same joy, too...

Loving someone makes me want to share -
all that i have: be it just a morsel
or a feast in a dreamy glass castle -
i would most gladly share with the one i care...

'It's the singer, not the song"

I believe that it is always the singer -
not the song, that captivates the audience...
it is his tilting, husky voice crooning love songs -
that tugs at the heart strings, and evoke feelings, so strong...

For it is definitely his moaning voice that keeps us mesmerised -\
it is he who keeps the audience pining for more ...
it is the emotions expressed that makes the difference -
between loving the singer and the feelings of nostalgia for his song...

"To Those I Love"

"When i am gone, release me, let me go
I have so many things to see and do
You mustn't tie yourself to me with tears
Be happy that we had so many years.
I gave you my love. You can only guess
How much you gave to me in happiness
I thank you for the love you have shown
But now it's time i traveled on alone.
So grieve awhile for me if grieve you must
Then let your grieve be comforted by trust
It's only for a while that we must part
So bless the memeories with your heart.
I won't be far away, for life goes on
So if you need me, call and i will come
Though you can't see or touch me, i'll be near
And if you listen with your heart, you'll hear
All my love around you soft and clear.
And then, when you must come this way alone
I'll greet you with a smile, and welcome you home."

I'd like to say this to my beloved:
please don't die on me - remember
you promised that you would take care of me...
so, never, never die before me -
for it would break my heart to see you go
coz i've placed my heart, my all into loving you...

Celebrating my last Teacher's Day

It's the day that all of us teachers(and students)look forward to -
it's the day to show our love and appreciation to all our teachers...
and for teachers, it's a welcome to be showered with little tokens -
that say very big Thank-yous and I-love-yous and a chance to repay...

This last Teacher's Day was passed with mixed feelings, though:
happy that it's going to be my last two and a half months,
but truly sad, too, at the thought of what i'm going to miss -
and that i'll be leaving all the warm smiles behind...
and that heart-warming feeling when a child you've often reprimanded
marches up to you, gift in hand, to say,"Happy Teacher's Day, Teacher."

But, i've learnt that, whatever it is, life has to go on -
and that friends are like the pebbles and boulders that one passes
on one's way to the sea: some do follow one all the way -
but others are left behind, never to meet again...

Which one are you, my dear little friends, i wonder?
the boulders or the pebbles, i oft times wonder...
Just which one are you, my special little friend -
the pebble or the boulder, i just wonder...

Trying to Draw the Line

I'm a living, breathing, thinking, feeling individual -
a friend to all those i call 'friend',
and a close companion to all my sisters;
i'm an elder to my nephews and nieces -
besides being a mother to my own daughter,
and also a teacher to all my students...

It's a role too many, sometimes i feel -
to be juggling all these responsibilities,
and to be a wife and home-maker, too;
but at times i feel truly blessed -
that so many have touched my life,
and given me the chance to touch theirs...

But there is this nagging feeling,
of having to draw the line -
(and yet feeling doubtful about it)
right where it is best for everyone,
right where it is fair, and just -
and also just the right thing to do...

I'm trying to be wise in my judgement -
and fair to all, by doing the best i can...
i have tried to teach discipline in a different way:
by being approachable, and caring, and loving,
and by always being there for them -
i hope they would one day understand...

That what is right for us -
may not be right for everyone;
and what is true for the majority -
may not be so, for the minority;
what is fair and just for us -
may, at times, be just as unjust and just as unfair...

So, who are we to make the decisions for others -
with the excuse that 'it is for their own good'?
who are we to be judgemental, and execute the lore -
when we, ourselves, are far from being perfect?
who can say for sure what is right or wrong -
save the one who is involved, who has a feeling strong?

So, as i've preached, that i now teach:
be cool, be smart, be just, and be strong,
make your own decisions on whatever it is that matters -
if your thoughts are clear, and your feelings are strong,
then you'll not have to point an accusing finger -
when things, unfortunately, did go wrong ...

Learning to Let Go

Yes, i love to hoard all the things that are precious to me -
things that i like, and definately those that i love, too...
i love to have them all with me, and near me, all the time -
and hope, i would never, ever, have to part with anything dear to me...

For it would surely break my heart -
to ever have to breakaway from the things that i love,
and those that i have loved, and treasured,
for such a long, long while...

And i would love to keep all my memories -
of all the things and all the people in my life...
those who have ever been in my past -
and those who have touched my heart...
those little things that i have treasured -
or those familiar faces that i've loved...

So, i hope to keep all these nostalgic memories with me -
for as long as i live, for as long as i can remember...

Loneliness is that strange feeling

Loneliness is what i feel -
sitting on the steps all, all alone...
loneliness is the word to describe this lonely feeling -
of being left all alone, being forgotten by the world...

Loneliness is not a nice feeling -
for it tells me that i'm here all alone...
i'm here, upstairs - and all three gates are securely locked -
trapped, and forgotten, and left alone, on a Saturday afternoon...

So, while others are merry making at a wedding feast -
i have only the birds to talk to, my only jovial company...
to think that there are creatures in this world -
who are oblivious to others' comforts, save their own,
makes me sad and angry but then i looked up and what i saw
makes me smile again, and fill my heart with love again...

For i believe there is hope for every one -
no matter how slim the chance of recovery...
no matter how bleak the future may seem -
i believe that God is there, and He takes care of things...

A Sunrise Is Another Beautiful Day

A sunrise is another beautiful day in life -
i used to say - but not lately...
no, not lately - not anymore -
my life seems to have lost its sunshine...
and though the sun still shines every morn
for me it has lost its warmth...

For life has its ups and downs -
and lately it seems to be at a low down...
and i look at your golden dawn each day -
with a big fat frown, and my heart do also frown...

And i can't find it in my heart, as each day dawns -
to even force a small smile...

Today I Feel Sad

No, it's not something that others had said -
that makes the spirits drop to a real bottomline low...
neither is it something that i had done, or not done -
that makes me feel very, very sad...

I guess it's what you have just said -
that brings the tears close to the brink...
it's the sad note in your voice and your words -
that wrings my heart, and makes it bleed...

For you have lost that jovial and confident demeanour -
and speak with so much sadness from your heart,
that i can't help but feel the pain, the sorrow -
which fill my own heart with melancholy, with remorse...

And the raindrops falling from the sky -
seems to blend with the teardrops from my heart...
and the pattering sounds of raindrops on the roof -
is the very echo of the sound of sadness in my own heart...

And as i gaze at the turbulent sky -
it reflects the darkness deep down in my own heart...
and, just like you, i wonder what the future has in store -
and, just like you, i have very little hope, when the heart is so sore...

"You are always on my mind"

I've been to nostalgic nooks and corners that i used to frequent -
and i've walked down all my favourite memory lanes...
but wherever i may go, wherever i may be -
you are always on my mind...

For i've come to have you in my thoughts, my mind -
ever since i let you into my heart...
and i've learnt to share all my thoughts,
and all my feelings with you, ever since...

It's coz you understand -
what i need, and what i want...
you've shown me that you understand -
what makes me happy, what makes me sad...
what brings out the tears, and what, my fears...
what truly thrills, and what jerks at the heart strings...

It's coz only you would understand -
what really makes me tick, what surely makes me smile...

Another milestone, another T-junction

As we traverse along the road of life -
we will stop a while to admire the beauty
of a wayward reed or a wild flower -
a bird, a bee, a beetle, or even two
they are all God's lovely creations -
they are all so lovely to me...

And there are times when we come
to a crossroad or a T-junction in life;
and have to decide which road to take -
times when we have to weigh our situation
and times when we have to make sacrifices -
or take a chance at what lies ahead of us...

At times like these, we must surely take a pause -
a longer break to just look around and ponder...
and then we must needs to really weigh each move -
and the consequences of our action, be it good or bad...
for we can't afford to go wrong, or make any blunder
as it may cause us to suffer, for the rest of our life...

Hence i would not do anything without much contemplation -
for i still want to be sure that the choice i make in life
is the right one, and that i'll never have to regret -
that i had chosen the wrong road, down which to travel...

The Simple Things in Life

I don't need castles made of marble -
a small wooden house would do for me...
i don't need to be at Beverly Hills -
but a house overlooking the sea and sunrise,
or a view of green hills and paddy fields -
that would also be paradise for me...

I don't need expensive holidays and posh hotels -
a simple place any where for a change will be welcome...
i don't fancy exotic meals in classy restaurants -
a simple meal of ulam and sambal belacan is delicious to me...
i don't need a chauffeur or a maid to run errands at my whims -
coz i'm a simple girl - and need not have someone at my beck and call...

I just want to have some time to look around -
some time to admire the beauty of nature waiting to be noticed...
some time to smell the pretty rose in the garden, or the wayward reed...
some time to watch the birds and the bees, the beetles and the ants...
some time to look at white clouds sailing in the sky, or raindrops on a leaf -
just give me some time to do all these little, little things in life...

For i can do without a lot of luxurious things in life -
but love is the only thing i hope to keep with me all my life...

It's gonna be a beautiful day

Yes, i've finally thought things out -
that i will strive to be happy every single day
that i will no longer over my troubles mope -
for life is so short, more so when one is fifty-eight...

So, dear friends, you'll never find me without my broadest smile -
ready to greet the day, each and every day of my life...
you'll never find me angry, or in tears, no, not anymore -
for i've learnt to be wise - to spend my last years being happy...
for time heals, and wounded hearts are also sealed -
so i'll be happy - even broken hearts will one day be whole again...

I've thought, and thought for so, so, long -
and have finally decided: i'll live life the way i love to...
i'll admire the sunrise, each and every day -
and walk barefoot on the beach, whenever there's a need to...
for life is so sweet, yet so short - it'll be over in a jiffy -
so i'll live life to the fullest today - for tomorrow may never be...

As my life on earth is numbered: i've finally reached that last quarter -
there is no turning back the clock, no time for regrets, or restarts...
i'm on my own, struggling to make the most of my time, and my life -
for it will be my last struggle, my last effort, to achieve whatever's lacking...

So, dear God, help me to strive on, without wavering -
this most difficult last effort, the last lap of my run...

Even The Moon Shies Away

Today i feel sad - for no particular reason -
i just feel sad, sometimes...
i just feel utterly bad, oft times...
just feel inapt to deal with my own feelings...

For i feel that i've let loved ones down -
by the things that i've done, and also not done...
by not being able to tell right, from wrong -
and being steadfast about what i feel is right, or wrong...

I've always been confident that i could tell -
what's right, and what's wrong...
but lately things have turned out to be different -
and i find it hard to go on trusting, and believing...

And when i looked through my window into the night sky -
all i could see was just the night sky:
no moon, no star; no love in my heart, no friend -
like trading the shiny kettle for a black pan...?
like running for the last hour, only to be told:
that one is on the wrong route, far from the end...?

Teaching Little Angels

Lately I've started counting the days -
'coz they are numbered...
and as each day draws a little nearer -
my heart feels elated, yet disappointed...

For i've been dealing with young angels -
trained to teach them the way of life...
taught myself to be more disciplined, as best i could -
that i may lead through example, as best i could...

I've enjoyed your young company -
and hope that you like mine, too...
i've laughed at your pranks, your jokes -
and tried to make you laugh at mine, too...

I've tried my best to keep my pledge -
to be both mother and friend,
not just your teacher, forever -
whenever you need help,
or someone to call 'friend' -
whenever you're sad, or sorry,
i'll be there, waiting to guide you -
waiting to hold your trusting hand...

I hope i'll never have to let you down -
and i do hope to be able to do much, much, more...
for your eager faces tell me you want to learn more -
much, much, more... each and every day that i see you...

I remember the moon

The moon - it reminds me of a place -
where young lovers come to spoon...
and if i'm not mistaken -
i could hear the nightingale singing
of a love gone by...
of a dream that passed her by...

Looking at the full moon -
is what all lovers do,
'coz that pale disc in the night sky -
is all that can be seen,
on starless nights like this -
as the lonely wolf howls out his mournful call...

Though tomorrow they will see a paler moon -
outshone by a smiling, shimmering, golden sun,
tonight they mourn the loss of a childhood dream -
and tomorrow it would lay buried in its deep grave,
like the shattered fragments of all broken dreams ...

I remember happy times like today

Today we played make believe -
just like children always do,
Queen E and i were cruising along in our Rolls Royce -
waving majestically to our loyal subjects...

Today we joked about life -
and what we would be doing if we had been thirty years younger!
today we joked about the days when we were green and innocent -
and oh, so, so gullible, were we then, so easy to please, too...!

Today we remembered old days -
and friends who were no longer with us, too...
and talked with nostalgia -
of the days gone by: happy ones and sad ones, too...

So today, is special, 'coz we forget
that we are in our twilight years -
but talked like children, of having fun,
and teasing each other was what we did, with glee...

For today is one of those fairy tale days -
of having fun, in a world of make believe...

Speak to me, not with words so clear

Do speak to me - for i love to hear you speak to me -
say what i wish to hear, not with your sweet words in my ear...
for there are times when words don't work anymore -
so speak to me - with your eyes, and your heart, so clear...

For you are the wind, that i cannot see -
but i'll know that you were here,
'coz you brushed against my cheek -
as you were passing by...

And i know you are still around -
when i see the leaves move and quiver,
and when i hear the gentle rustling among the trees...
i'll know that you are near...

So speak not in words that i can no longer hear -
for you are the wind that blows far and near...
speak not, but with your eyes and your heart, so clear -
and i'll know my invisible wind is here, and near...

Life's like that

Once in a while things seem to be different -
in a lovely kind of way...
and life seems to be so, so beautiful -
i can't believe that it could be true...
and Destiny seems to cast a smile -
no, i guess not - that can't be for me...

For life has always been a big strugggle -
and happiness that elusive dream...?
that if Destiny were to show me that smile -
i'll have to be wary, and most certainly wonder:
is it really, truly meant for me...?
is it mine or is it just a mirage in the desert...?

But i won't give up hoping and praying -
that one day, Destiny would really smile for me...!
i will not ever lose sight of my dream -
for they are all that i have - a beautiful dream...